“In your life, you meet people. Some you never think about again. Some, you wonder what happened to them. There are some that you wonder if they ever think about you. And then there are some you wish you never had to think about again. But you do.”
Tag Archives: distance
In your life, you meet people. Some you never think…
January 5, 2013 · 3:00 PM
It’s hard to sa…
“It’s hard to say you’re seeing someone when you don’t see them.”
December 22, 2012 · 12:49 AM
Part 2 – The One Who Got Away
Now my head is messed up. This entry is an update to the post I made yesterday entitled The One Who Got Away Just Contacted Me. I was super excited and totally freaking out about see him again.
Here goes…
I met him at that park where we went for a walk the first day we met. It’s also the same place where I do all of my rollerblading. He’s early…I had planned on getting there before him so I could try and relax while drinking my coffee. Considering he lives about 45 minutes away from me, the fact that he was early made me think he really must have wanted to see me.
He rode his sport bike and of course looked as handsome and sexy as ever. He hadn’t changed a bit. He asked for a hug first thing. His hug is strong and soft at the same time. The kind of hug where you feel safe. I could have melted. Damn, how does he have that effect on me?!?
We talked, laughed and caught up. We did go rollerblading for a short time. About 2kms or so. I say short since when I go on my own its usually at least 10kms. All the while I’m checking him out and wondering why is he here?
Afterwards we stop at my place to drop off his motorcycle and go out for lunch. He constantly complimented me about how great I look and how smart I am. He even mentioned that he doesn’t understand why or how I’m still single. This is where I mentioned that I now write this blog about my dating misadventures, even about the epiphany I had the other day. We even talked about why things didn’t work between us. Mainly the distance between us.
He instantly asked if I had written about him. I told him I did just that morning and he wanted to read it. Ah crap.. After a few minutes I get out my phone and let him read the post. He commented that he thought it was sweet and again how intelligent I am. I was slightly embarrassed that he got to have a glimpse into my head.
All the while we are talking and hanging out he looks at me right in the eyes. I swear this man has the most intense eyes. He looks Right at me and when he does I know, or at least think, he’s with me and his head isn’t anywhere else. I don’t know how he does it.
After lunch we somehow fit in some snuggle time on my couch. It felt like how we were before…although in my head I’m thinking it’s been over a year since I’ve physical seen this man and almost 5 months since we had any contact with each other (the June birthday text I sent). The connection and attraction was definitely still there.
Finally, he had to leave so that he could pick his daughter up from school. I ended up taking a short nap since my head was swimming (and still is). I needed a break.
I. Will. Not. Chase.
I swore I wasn’t going to text him first. Swore it. Even swore to my friend who agreed that when I talked about him, I did indeed call him the one who got away.
A couple hours later he texts me to tell me he had a great time. Holy shit.. It’s not like we had a bad time, but I sincerely have no idea where this is going.
Later that night, after our kids were in bed, my phone is blown up by him..and his blown up by mine. It was like old times. Although I’m truly trying to hold back. Why should I let him just waltz back into my life when I don’t really know what his intentions are. I wouldn’t say I was hurt the last time around but I was definitely disappointed. The reality of the distance was there from the get-go.
I’m dumbfounded. My mind is boggled. A big huge WTF and where did this come from?
I’m definitely over analyzing every minute and every text. Sadly I’m being a typical woman right now and I hate it.
You’ve Met Someone Decent, Now What?
You’ve talked to someone and finally had your first meeting. Everything seems to have gone smoothly and you both express that you want to see each other again. What do you do now?
I ask this question because you still have the account on the dating site. Most likely when you log in you will be able to see if the other person has logged in and vice versa. You may have logged in to hide your profile because you’re happy about meeting that person. Why has the other person logged in? To do the same? To talk to other people they might be interested in? Would it seem like one is moving too fast if they instantly delete their profile after a first meeting?
This is something that is hard to determine since you know you have just met and there is no commitment. You hope that the person liked you as much as you liked them. This is where you feel like a kid again by the way. Despite being an adult, the same things we wondered about our crushes when we were young, still happens when we grow older.
In this age of technology, we hear of people cheating on spouses with people they have met online or meeting lots of people for sexual purposes. That being said, even the most secure person will wonder about this new person they have met. Are they telling the truth or are they lying? How do we know?
If we know enough about the person then we could use some sleuthing techniques like creeping their Facebook(assuming their privacy settings aren’t set too high) or Googling their name. This appears slightly like stalker behaviour but what you’re really doing is reading information that this person has already published about themselves. The only reason why you after specifically looking for this information is to find any red flags that would result in you not wanting to pursue anything further.
An example of this would be a man that told me that he did not have a criminal record. Yet, upon creeping his Facebook Wall I found that he had recently been released from a provincial jail and was still being remanded into custody on weekends…. Umm, no thanks.
I digress….
I pose the question to whoever reads this:
What do you think the proper way of handling this situation where you have met someone you like that you have met online?
Online Dating Profile – Top 7 Assumptions about You
- No Picture – Either you’re hiding something (married or whatever) or you’re the fat guy who selected the “Athletic” option to see what he could catch.
- One Line Messages – You just looked at the pictures and that’s all. Also you really don’t have much to say because you didn’t read or want to read the profile.
- Pictures vs. Profile – You say you don’t party anymore, yet your pictures are all party pictures? Really?
- Old Pictures – If it’s 2012 and your picture has a date stamp of 2009 and before… it’s old. There’s a good chance you don’t look like that anymore. (Gained or lost weight, haircut, etc)
- Activity – You say you like to be active but you list all the shows you like to watch on a weekly basis. Really, who are you kidding..?
- Type/Talk to Text – Do you talk like you text? If you have a keyboard with all the letters…wouldn’t it make sense to use them? (side note: Do you purposely leave the “h” off of “with”? Misspelling a word to make it look how you say it does not make you seem intelligent..sorry..
- You live Where? – People who message people hours away to meet but have no means of transportation. Have you seen the price of gas lately? Let’s be realistic.
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The newest one..
I started talking to a man about a week ago. Not sure why I keep talking to him. The man already has two strikes against him and he doesn’t even know it. For those who don’t know, both my exes have the same first name. This man also has this name. My mother swore she would shoot me if I dated another man with that name….so strike one. The next, he works for the military. Awesome career…but I have two kids. I’m not able to move if they get posted elsewhere. My children’s father is here. I refuse to leave them and cannot take their father from their life.
Some would say I’m being too picky and that I should just let love happen. As great as that sounds….I believe the fear of heartache again has won when it comes to this man.
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